Author: Stephen Warren

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OUR LIFE SPIRAL

Life Spiral

A strange paradox of life is that the more we attempt to perfect it, the more imperfect it seems to become. At first, this paradox would seem to imply that life is hopeless. But it is precisely this imperfection that makes it so interesting and promising. From birth to death, life is a continuum of change – an ongoing series of events, happenings, and transitions. We are born as a bundle of potentiality. We grow and learn. We face challenges and obstacles. We experience the good and the bad, hope and despair, happiness and sadness. We mature from these experiences and develop a much richer understanding of our Purpose in life.

Having a clear Purpose and faith in ourselves will help us navigate the twists and turns of life. Life is never going to move in a straight line. It will never be predictable at any point in time. It spirals continuously, from some place we have been to some place we are going. To keep pace with these constant transitions we must always be aware of our Purpose as we confront the challenges of change and self-renewal. We can manage the effect of life’s paradoxes by first recognizing and accepting their inevitability and then by making Purposeful choices to manage them. Since we have unlimited opportunities to do so we have an open invitation to make life more significant and worthwhile. The one thing we cannot do is stand still.

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THE COMMODITY OF TIME

The quest for time should be equal to our quest for life. In reality they are one and the same, with each deserving the same reverence and respect. Our time should be viewed for what it really is, a finite resource. We cannot create more of it; we cannot live it over; and we cannot save it for another day. It happens and then it is gone. It is the ultimate equalizer for all of mankind, with kings and paupers being allotted an equal amount, to either use wisely or to waste.

Our difficulty with time mastery is due to its internal paradoxes. We live as if there are infinite tomorrows, then mourn the fact there is never enough time to do all the things we need to do today. We set aside time for ourselves; then squander it relentlessly. We plead for more of it; then procrastinate until there is no time left. Time seems to race when we are enjoying ourselves and then tediously plods along when we must do something we dislike. As children, we sense it moving slowly, then as adults complain at how quickly it passes with each new birthday.

The quest for time in our lives remains one of our greatest challenges. We never seem to know how to get a grip on this thing called time, even though it has been around since day one. With generations of experience behind us, we should be time management experts by now. We have learned how to relate to it by measuring it with clocks and calendars. We read time management books, go to seminars and buy time organizers to plot out our daily priorities. We know about time from seasons, from bodily functions and from scientific inquiry. We know from physics that time curves through space and we know how fast light travels in one calendar year. We even have clichés and rules to guide our use of time, such as a stitch in time saves nine, time stands still for no man, time is of the essence and there is no time like the present.

Yet with all of our insights and with all of our rules, we are still dissatisfied about our use of time. Our inability to manage time in our lives is not through our lack of knowledge nor in the manner of how it affects our lives. Our poor time utilization is simply due to our inability to equate our needs with our time requirements. Our failure in time management often stems from our doing too much, from taking too little or too much time to do it, and even from doing things at the wrong time. But most importantly, we are not doing the things that matter the most to us. Essentially, our time clock is not synchronized with our Purpose, our Values and our Mission.  Once it is, we will find that we have plenty of time.

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WHAT IS THE SIMPLE LIFE?

A simple life is where we are simply living! It is nothing more and nothing less. When we are in touch with just the simple process of living, relishing in the uncomplicated pleasures that are abundantly available to us, we will find the inner peace that we are seeking.

A simple life focuses on what we do have rather than being critical of what we don’t have. It finds less joy in material possessions and greater joy in natural wonders, hearty laughter, warm embraces, stimulating conversations and long walks in the woods. It values ideas over things, peaceful meditation over argumentative debates, reading over television, quiet solitude over pushy crowds and lasting trends over temporary fads.

The simple life favors giving more than receiving. It is to live humbly with pride, rather than ostentatiously without virtue. A simple life knows what is most important, content with the quiet conviction of lasting principals.

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TOO MUCH STUFF

Chill OutOur fascination with stuff is not the problem. It is the lifestyle that we must pursue to acquire, maintain and manage our stuff.  All of this stuff is the antithesis to a sane, balanced and purposeful life. While we tend to believe that our happiness emanates from our possessions it is, in fact, these same possessions that become the bane and curse to a joyful and meaningful life.

According to Elaine St. James, Wise men and women in every major culture throughout history have found that the secret to happiness is not in getting more but in wanting less.

Only when we make it our Purpose to not make stuff the measure of our contentment, will we truly understand how simply beautiful (and beautifully simple) life can be lived.

Thinking and living simply is not a character flaw, a weakness of drive and ambition; rather, it is vigorous, inspiring, courageous and reflective of our conviction of Purpose. Life and happiness is not made from stuff; it is a state of mind, made from the interwoven fabric of purposeful attitudes and the belief that life, in itself and by itself, is sufficient and plentiful. Our most meaningful rewards in life will always be the simplest ones.

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IT IS OUR LIFE

 

We have been given that marvelous gift to do with as we choose. It is life itself that we should embrace. It is ours to live. Too often, we lose sight of this miracle called life. We take it for granted. We abuse it. We waste it. We criticize it for its difficulty. We believe we didn’t get our fair share. We fault our opportunities and condemn our lack of good fortune. We feel that the best of what life has to offer rarely comes to us. But with all this blame and criticism of our life, we rarely believe it is our fault. We expect happiness to come our way, and if it doesn’t, then the rest of the world is whom we indict for its unfairness. Yet, we alone create the good fortune that we will receive. We cannot wait for our ship to come in. We must swim out to it. We should not waste another moment agonizing over how unfair life can be; rather we should rejoice that it even exists.

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DESIDERATA

Expressions-12

The following quote from Max Ehrmann is probably the best self-help piece ever written. If we all lived our lives with the following words in mind, we would have no need for any other advice:

Go placidly amid the noise and the haste, and remember what peace there may be in silence. As far as possible, without surrender, be on good terms with all persons. Speak your truth quietly and clearly; and listen to others, even to the dull and ignorant; they too have their story. Avoid loud and aggressive persons; they are vexations to the spirit. If you compare yourself with others, you may become vain or bitter, for always there will be greater and lesser persons than yourself. Enjoy your achievements as well as your plans. Keep interested in your own career, however humble; it is a real possession in the changing fortunes of time. Exercise caution in your business affairs for the world is full of trickery. But let this not blind you to what virtue there is; many persons strive for high ideals, and everywhere life is full of heroism. Be yourself. Especially do not feign affection. Nor be cynical about love; for in the face of all aridity and disenchantment, it is as perennial as the grass. Take kindly the counsel of the years, gracefully surrendering the things of youth. Nurture strength of spirit to shield you in sudden misfortune. But do not distress yourself with dark imaginings. Many fears are born of fatigue and loneliness. Beyond a wholesome discipline, be gentle with yourself. You are a child of the universe no less than the trees and the stars; you have a right to be here. And whether or not it is clear to you, no doubt the universe is unfolding as it should. Therefore be at peace with God, whatever you conceive Him to be. And whatever your labors and aspirations, in the noisy confusion of life, keep peace in your soul. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.

Max Ehrmann

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TOUGH QUESTIONS

From time to time, we should hit the pause button in our lives, look deep within and answer these tough questions:

Have I ever relied upon my Purpose as the basis for anything that I have done in life?

Have I ever put my Purpose to work in planning the life I will lead?

If asked to state my unique Purpose in life, could I respond with anything more than a blank and perplexed stare?

Can I recall when I last made an informed choice or decision based on the knowledge of my specific Purpose?  

Do I know for what Purpose I will choose to do anything different in the future than what I have done in the past? 

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RUNNING ON EMPTY

Do you feel you are running through life like Forrest Gump? Simply running without knowing why you are running or to where you are running?  And running in a rat race that never seems to have a finish line?  Feeling like you are running on empty most of the day?

There is a simple reason for that: You are more preoccupied with doing life than living life. You are consumed with the Busyness of life rather than the Purpose of it. Maybe today would be a good time to stop focusing on Human Doing and instead focus on Human Being.